You Made Me Mad, You Offended Me!
By Michael Wells
Posted Monday, April 12, 2004
“I don’t really care if they like me or not, I like them!”
Proverbs 18:19, A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city,
And contentions are like the bars of a citadel.
“You offended me!” It is always said in the form of an accusation and in a manner indicating the need to change the offensive behavior. After all, the most important thing is that people tiptoe around and never offend self. Heaven forbid, if self was offended. Pastors hear it all the time. The statement is actually said with a tone of spirituality. However, the statement reveals a pathetic, others-controlled person, not a spirit-controlled person. A man was taking a shortcut, found himself in the middle of a soccer game, hurried to get out of the way, and as he was running accidentally kicked the ball and a made a point. This man had not made a planned offense; it was all by accident. However, the team that was on defense started screaming, “You have ruined the game and given our opponents a point!” The man just stood in amazement. Why blame him? He was just running through, and the defense was terrible. If a stranger who doesn’t know the game can score, then the defense is in need of being fixed. If you keep getting offended by this person and that person--who are only stumbling and bumbling in front of you--fix your own defense. You are the one with the problem, not them. Oh, it sounds better to say they have the problem, but if they really do have an obvious problem and you allow them to offend, you are even in worse shape. You are surrendering your peace to a contentious person. You should be fit enough spiritually that no one can offend you. One fellow said to me, “I don’t really care if they like me or not, I like them!” Another statement that goes right along with what we are talking about is, “You made me mad.” What exactly does that mean? That I am your god and your happiness rests in my hands? Amazing! I didn’t know that I had that kind of power over you! The fact is this: You surrendered your joy to my behavior and your misery is completely and utterly consented to by your will. You allowed yourself to get mad, and instead of wearing your weakness, it sounds better to your flesh to indicate that I did it. I didn’t do it. You did it, and you are the failure. Men say that their wives make them mad. No one can MAKE them anything. They choose to allow themselves to be mad. Stop being deceived, take the blame, and take charge of your own happiness. Well, amen!
